SEM 10: The #1 Rule For Building Trust As A Leader
If you surprise people often you will lose trust and credibility as a manager.
A simple mantra for effective management is “no surprises”.
You don’t want to surprise your stakeholders, customers, or team.
The one certainty about being an engineering manager is that things will go wrong. Sometimes, these are things you can’t predict, like a cloud provider outage, but other times, you should be aware of the issue and communicate early to avoid surprises.
Whether a surprise is your fault or not, the outcome is the same. If you surprise stakeholders, you lose trust and credibility.
Senior leaders are accountable to their management chain, and last-minute surprises make them look incompetent, leading them to trust you less.
Surprises in the context of engineering leadership might include
Surprise project delays: Failure to communicate delays or issues in advance leads to stakeholder and customer dissatisfaction.
Surprise last-minute demands on your team: Making last-minute demands on your team (”I need you to fix this bug by 5 p.m. today”) leads to chaos and stress.
Making significant changes without consulting your team: Rolling out new policies or tools without consulting or providing adequate preparation can lead to resistance and workflow disruption.
Overpromising and underdelivering: Setting unrealistic expectations for product capabilities or project timelines frustrates customers and stakeholders.
Hope isn’t a strategy.
What do most managers do in the face of potential surprises?
Many choose to tread water, hoping that issues will resolve themselves or, better yet, go unnoticed. This hope-based strategy is not only flawed but inherently risky. It's a gamble where the stakes are the team's success and your credibility as a manager.
This approach remains common in many companies due to our natural fear of confrontation and difficult conversations.
Example: Project Delivery
Imagine you and your team are working on an important project with executive visibility. The project is behind schedule, and you know you won’t deliver on time. But you’re worried your VP will be angry if you raise the issue.
VP: “Are you on track to deliver?”
✅ Good: Communicate what is happening (the project will be late), why it’s happening (an unexpected problem was identified), and what the new ETA is.
👎 Bad: Say, “Yes, we’re on track,” and hope it works out. Avoid the difficult conversations.
It’s not easy, but the earlier you raise issues, the more time executives have to reset expectations and plan around the delays.
Why does this happen?
The root cause for surprises like these usually falls into one of three categories.
Planning: Inadequate or over-optimistic planning and estimation.
Communication: Poor communication of risks and problems. Fear of confrontation and difficult conversations may be at the heart of communication failure.
Black swans: Sometimes, the issues are out of your control and could not have been foreseen.
How do we avoid surprises?
Planning (work backwards)
To avoid surprises, a manager should use planning to anticipate potential issues and develop contingency plans, ensuring everyone is thinking ahead. Working backwards is a good approach for project planning, starting with the deadline and working backwards to understand if your timeline is realistic.
Regular review (pay attention)
Don’t wait until it’s too late to check if a project is on track. Important projects should be reviewed at least weekly to understand their progress.
Use milestones to gain confidence and deal with issues that arise early.
Communication
It’s better to deliver bad news early. Regularly share updates and pertinent information with all stakeholders, maintaining clarity and trust.
Culture
I’ve been in organisations where people were afraid to speak up for fear of punishment. These environments are toxic and lead to people hiding information. Build a fearless team culture where people feel encouraged and safe to speak up, identifying and raising risks early without fear of repercussions.
Accountability
Establishing a culture of accountability is crucial. You should aim to create a sense of responsibility among team members where they speak up and inform you when things are not going to plan. Ensure everyone feels committed to the project's success and understands their role in preempting surprises.
Takeaway
Adopt the motto of “no surprises”.
Surprises cause stress, anxiety, panic, and chaos.
If you surprise people often, you will lose trust and credibility as a manager. Always aim to be predictable and reliable. This will build trust with your customers, team, and stakeholders.
Thanks for reading.
Get in touch
I’m always happy to meet and talk with other engineering managers. Let’s connect on LinkedIn.